As a mom I feel like I need to build them up, the kids need a strong base and self esteem to enter the “real world”. We build them up so it doesn’t hurt so bad when life knocks them down. If I have learned one MAJOR thing over the last 10-15 years it would be that WE DO NOT HAVE CONTROL of life, rather only control of how we act and react to life and what it hands us. So, how do we prepare our children for life??!
- Establish a safe and strong home base. By letting your kids know home is their safe spot and they can tell you anything. Especially during the preteen, teenage times I want my kids to know I am here, not only to listen, but to help. I can not fix all problems by any means, but I can be there to help them work through life as best as they can and also for the emotional support needed. I can’t tell them enough, no matter what happens or what choices are made, I will always love them and be here for them. I love that my family is my rock!
- Be a Role Model. I know this one is super tough! Just do your best, they are always watching. But remember even on the tough days when you feel like you failed as a mom-you are still a hero to them.
- Be Kind. Kindness TOTALLY matters! This is something I think needs to be taught starting early and reinforced all the way through. I was walking out of the Primary School this morning and saw a large bulletin board display that said Sprinkle Kindness Like Confetti, and I instantly had a smile on my face. I am a firm believer to be kind whenever possible and it is always possible!
- Boost Their Self Esteem. I think about this one all the time! I am always looking for ways to BOOST them up. I am HUGE fan of post it notes-just a little note here and there to show you care and make them feel good. I also hang up an inspirational quote each day in the kitchen (our main hub at our house). My daughters especially look forward to seeing this each morning before school. By using notes and quotes I am able to simply remind them how AWESOME they are:)
- Learn from life’s experiences/mistakes. ABSOLUTELY NOBODY IS PERFECT and that is OK! Many times people seem different or unique, and we need to try to remember that is what makes them special and them! Regardless to following all these steps, life is unpredictable and definitely not fair. I am always reminding my “big kids”, we don’t know everyone else’s battle, so instead of immediately being judgmental, there may be a reason for anger or sadness, despite the fact they are trying. Sometimes all people need is a kind word or a smile to change how their day is going. We often feel life isn’t fair, but our trials and obstacles often help us become who we are.
So, we truly do NOT have any control over life, but we DO have control how we respond or react. Being completely honest this is something even as an adult I have to sometimes take a minute and realize it all over again. Life is journey-Enjoy the journey!